She's learning.
At 17, she's only fallen down a few times, not enough to teach her the ways of the world.
The age where, from one country to the other, she had to adjust. Learn and explore the world that's opening itself to her in the form of a different place, one where she has the chance to have a new life: establish new friendships, find interesting new hobbies, see places, learn.
Like a newborn child, she had to grasp a reality where she has nothing except for what she already had. Knowledge and experience: these are what makes up a person's existence. And this is what she's holding on to.
She's broken.
At 18, she trusted too much, cared too much, loved too much.
The age where she gave everything to a guy she thought was "the one". Never losing her innocence, she willingly molded her world to revolve around love, too young to realise this isn't how life goes.
This is the year she slept through the whole year, just to wake up, 18 and still feeling the way she was the day before.. and the day before that.. and the week.. and months that's already passed, not letting go of the pain that she caused herself thinking she deserves it.
She's confused.
At 19, she knows enough to not be led to do the wrong thing but because of her childlike mindset and teenage misery, she repeatedly screws up.
This is the age between her as a child and her as an adult. The bridge of life she's stuck in for three hundred sixty five days, going back and forth, back and forth to progress and failure. But who is she to be judged. She is but a child, learning from her mistakes. But no, she is an adult too, learned of the world and aware of her actions.
She's lost.
By age 20, she's been around for two decades now, have her fair share of mistakes and successes that define who she is and how she is.
This is the age where she is expected to suddenly act mature, lose her unmissable youthful thoughts and become part of the adult world where everything is but small step away from craziness. Also the age where she begins admiring the importance of coffee in everyone's lives including her own.
A cup of coffee a day, makes her sanity stay.
And this is the year she is given another chance at education, learning inside four walls. And this is also the year she learns to lie and lie and lie. Too afraid to admit that she doesn't know what she's doing with her life and that she's losing her edge.
The year where despite everything that's going wrong with her and her oblivious parents, she finds love, in its true form.
And though she may be lost, she is loved.
